Visiting Day with David and Monday Blog Hops

Yesterday Davis and I drove down to visit with David.  It was great to see him.  It's about an hour and half drive and with the cost of gas and snacks in the visit room and everyone's schedules competing for cars, we only get to go to visits every couple of weeks.  It's an exhausting process, but it's well worth it.
We left the house at noon and after making a couple stops (for gas and chicken nuggets for Davis to eat on the ride) we were on our way.  Davis ate his lunch and fell asleep as he usually does.
With traffic, we go there about 2pm.  And then began the process to go in to visits.
First stop....the bathroom to change Davis and use the facilities.
Next....go to the machine and put money on the card for the snack machines.

Third.....fill out the paper requesting a visit;  find my license, Davis' birth certificate, and the car registration.
Fourth....wait in line at the window and hand in all paperwork.  Get everything back except the paper requesting the visit.
Fifth....put everything into a locker except what we're allowed to bring in (empty sippy cup, 2 pullups, plastic baggie with baby wipes, 1 pacifier, card for the vending machines and locker key)


And then we wait for the intake processing......


After a few minutes, sometimes longer depends on the day and how many people are there, we get called to get processed through.


This starts with taking off our shoes and placing them and everything else we'll be bringing in with us on a table.
Then Davis and I each walk through a metal detector separately now that he can do it on his own.  
As we do that, they look through our shoes and everything else we're bringing in to make sure it's allowed.
Yesterday, I was lucky and got to be their random pat search for the shift. For that a female officer takes me behind a partition and looks in my mouth, under my hair and at the bottoms of my feet as well as patting me down.


After all that, they hand me the paper I had filled out requesting the visit and we go sit on a bench and put our shoes back on.  After they do this process with several people, they signal to another officer behind the glass to buzz the door and we are let into the "visitor trap".   Only after that door is closed behind us do they buzz the second door open and let us into the visit room. 


Once inside, we head over to the desk to hand them our paper and then go find a seat and wait for David to be brought in.  Davis usually goes into the play room to play while we wait.  They have legos and a few other toys and some books in there which keep him entertained.


Finally, we get to the good part.  David comes in and we get to spend several hours with him.  It's almost like things were before he went to prison.  We get to talk face to face, he can hug Davis and I.  It's great.  I love seeing them together and of course I love getting to spend time with David.  We eat sandwiches and snacks from the vending machines and play games and just hang out.  I can almost forget where we are for a while.


Yesterday we stayed until the visit period ended at 8:30pm.  It's a long day for Davis, but he loves his Daddy and I know spending time together is great for both of them.  The hardest part is saying good-bye.  I never know when I'll be able to get there for another visit because there are so many things in the way of getting there.  And I know Davis doesn't understand.  He's already started saying things like "Daddy home?" And I don't know how to explain to him that Daddy isn't coming home for a few years.  I've tried looking for picture books to read to him about it, but there aren't many.  The ones that I can find are usually not accurate to what we're actually going through or seem to emphasize the "Daddy did something bad" aspect of things which I think is unnecessary.   I know at some point we'll have to explain what David did to Davis, but I think 2 is way to young to be stressed out by hearing those things. It's just such a hard situation, I'm not sure what to do.

Skateboarding Toddler and Saturday Blog Hops

This is Davis' favorite thing to do lately.  He sees his older cousins out in the driveway skateboarding with their friends on a daily basis so of course he wants to join in.  So far, he mostly sits on the skateboard and pushes himself around with his feet or stands on it while watching the boys.  He loves when either I or one of the older boys holds his hands and kind of pulls him around on the board.  I love that he's having so much fun, but I dread the day when he's able to actually skateboard because I know he'll get hurt.  Oh well, at least he's getting in the habit of wearing the helmet now so I won't have to worry as much when he gets a bit older and is out there skateboarding on his own.  

Friday Blog Hops....and a Mini-Rant

So here's my Fawk You Friday list.....

Fawk you to the lady at the library who glares at me like I'm stealing the damn books when I take out more than say 4 or 5 at a time....I like to read and don't have the time to come back every 3 days, ok?!

Fawk you to this stupid drizzle crap....if it's going to rain, just get it over with and downpour already instead of spitting at me all day.

Fawk you to teenagers who don't clean up after themselves, I know you know how.....the 2 year old knows how. It's not complicated to put an empty soda can in the recycling bag or a dish in the sink.

Fawk you to my inability to sleep at night and therefore, Fawk you to my inability to get up in the morning. Insomnia sucks!

Fawk you to the constant high levels of stress in my life, can't things start going well again?




And taking a cue from CB.......a big FUCK you to the people who are making it so difficult to keep my little man in daycare. He loves it there and has had enough taken away from him already, just leave it alone.....I'm doing everything I can to find work and go back to school next semester, why the hell can't you let him stay in daycare for a couple months while I job search and work part time for my online job?!?

Tuesday Blog Hop and I'm "That" Mom

The week before last, when I brought Davis to school, his teacher asked if I could try to bring him in earlier than I had been. Since Davis started, we've slowly been getting there later and later. At first I'd get him there by 8:30, now I'm lucky to get him there by 9:30. The problem with this is that they start their curriculum portion of the day between 9 and 9:30 so Davis missed out on circle time a few times and one day he missed out on the morning activity because we got there too late. I knew this had been an issue I just didn't realize until that day how bad it had become. I work from home at the moment so I would just take my time in the mornings and try to get Davis there when he was ready.
After they said something to me, I made more of an effort to get him there on time and have been doing fairly well. He's usually there by 9 or 9:15 now. I know I should try to get him there earlier than that even but it's hard since we're not really morning people.
This morning, we were running late because we had to wait for my aunt to get home from work so we could take her car to drive Davis to school. So Davis didn't get there until 9:30 or a little after that. When we walked into the school, the director was in her office and called out good morning as she usually does. I noticed as I replied that she glanced up at the clock. Even though we had a valid reason for running late, I felt like I was back in high school being chastised for being late to class. Ugh. I hate that feeling.
I hate even more being the only mom in his class who does this. All the other kids are there by the time Davis gets there so I feel like I'm holding things up.

How Do I LOVE Thee

I got this idea from Debi over at The TRUTH about Motherhood. Several weeks ago and finally got around to finishing this post today. With the mood I've been in lately, it seemed like a good idea to refocus on some of the positive things in my life, so here goes.....

DAVIS

I love the way you wake me up by standing on my bed saying "Mommy, get up please" in the morning.
I love that you're polite even in your sleep...When Alec comes in to give you a hug after he gets home at night you put your hand out and say "No, away please" without even opening up your eyes.
I love that you have inherited a love of reading from your Daddy and me.


I love that you now pick out your own bedtime stories.
I love that you ask for your favorite books by name.
I love that you love school.
I love that you are so willing to try new things, including foods.
I love how excited you get when you see the mail truck drive by our house.
I love that when you get a new letter from Daddy, you won't let it go for at least ten minutes after I've given it to you and read it to you.
I love how helpful you are around the house.
I love that you're a daredevil, even if it scares me sometimes.
I love the way you act like you're chewing in your sleep.
I love how gentle and caring you are with babies we see and with your baby doll.


I love how excited you are to see me when I pick you up from school everyday.
I love how you tell me all about what you see out the window of the car as we're driving along.
I love that you won't go to sleep without a "bobo" (pacifier) in your mouth and one in each hand.
I also love that you're only using the "bobo" for bed, naps and when you're upset/not feeling well.
I love that your version of "talking to Daddy on the phone" is to put your face up to the phone, say "hi Daddy.....all done" and walk away.
I love it more when you come back and do this multiple times during a phone call with him.
I love that every time my phone rings you look up and say, "my Daddy". Although, it breaks my heart a little that you think of Daddy as a phone call or a picture by the bed rather than remembering all the good times we have spent with him.


I love your smile.
I love your laugh.
I love when you ask me to tickle you.
I love your adventurous spirit.
I love how much you love to explore.
I love your love of nature and being outdoors.


I love that you're generally a happy boy.
I love how opinionated you can be.
I love that you're stubborn, and I hope that it means you won't give in to peer pressure as easily as some kids do.
I love how creative you are.
I love your imagination. For example, the puma you've been telling us lives in the trees in the backyard and the bear we come across on our walks around the block.
I love how "country" you are and always have been.


I love that you enjoy some of my favorite TV shows from when I was little, like Disney's Gummi Bears.
I love when you pretend to be a Gummi Bear and drink Gummiberry Juice and bounce around.
I love that you have started answering the questions asked on children's TV shows like Dora, Diego and Thomas.
I love when you dance and sing to the theme songs.
I love how much you love the water.
I love that you are starting to learn to swim and hopefully, you'll continue this winter with swim lessons.

Toddler Talk Thursdays

This week's topic is Traveling with a Toddler.....

The first time we traveled with Davis, he was six weeks old and we flew to Arkansas to visit David's mother. He was surprisingly good the whole trip. At that point, he slept most of the flight, waking up for takeoff and landings. We had heard from other parents that the important thing to know while flying with infants is to either feed them or have them suck on a pacifier during takeoffs and landings so their ears pop or else it can be painful so we made sure to do that. The airline gave us a certificate for his first flight which was really nice.

The most exciting part of the traveling was when David went to change Davis' diaper in the tiny airplane bathroom and almost threw him away. The changing table was lined up with the trash receptacle which David didn't realize until he was changing the diaper. At that time Davis had the habit of bending and straightening his legs while you were changing him and he straightened his legs as David picked up his legs to slide the clean diaper under his bum so his body slid across the changing table and his head poked through the flap to the trash receptacle. Davis kinda freaked out of course, but later we found this highly amusing. Daddy almost threw away the baby.

Traveling with Davis is more of a challenge now of course because he doesn't like to sit still so keeping him busy is very important. The furthest we've gone lately though is car rides for a couple hours. Those are usually pretty easy, as long as I remember to bring juice or milk and snacks as well as a few books and toys.

I usually pack a coloring book and crayons, a few of his favorite story books that are small enough for him to hold himself, a couple of cars and his Thomas and Dora stuffed toys that he sleeps with during nap time.

Another thing I do is to bring a few cds of kids music that he likes and some cds that I like as well. He's not really picky about music as long as he can car dance to it and sometimes he even sings along.

What's Wrong With My Little Man? Part 2

I took Davis to the Dr. the other day. They think it was just a virus he had but sent me home with a kit to take a stool sample to check for bacteria just in case. The Dr. said it could just have been the post nasal drip upsetting his stomach while he's laying down so I've been propping him up on pillows at night. He tends to wiggle off them though. So far, he's been fine. No new symptoms and no more throwing up at night. I still worry that it might be something else because he would seem fine for a day or two and then start back up again. I'm keeping a bucket next to the bed for a while just in case. Hopefully this will be the end of this and he'll be fine.